Are Boot Camps Good for Troubled Teens?
If you are experiencing problems with your teenager then it can be
very tempting to throw up your hands in despair, make a few phone calls,
sign a big check and pack them off to a boot camp.
For some, this is probably the very best thing that you can do when
you truly have exhausted all other options. If you have tried counseling
and residential programs and nothing has worked to snap your teen out
of their bad ways, the truth is that boot camps can be a good idea as a
last throw of the dice to get them to shape up.
But for most situations, you are better off to try some less drastic measures first.
The whole point of boot camps is to provide massive leverage for them
to change. It shows them that they are not in charge and that there
genuinely are consequences for bad behavior. But the problem is that as
well as that they also indicate that you as their parent are not really
in control. You are trying to smash a walnut with a sledgehammer, and
while you may end up with a nut after the hammer-blow, your child will
almost certainly be more than a little battered and bruised as a result.
A better next step is generally to explore residential programs
which take a more softly-softly approach, but in most cases can have
some very satisfying results.
You should look for residential programs where there is a focus on
therapy rather than correcting behavior with discipline only. At the end
of the day, your child's change needs to come from within them, and no
amount of cajoling will change that fact.
At some stage, they need to re-assess their behavior and make a
genuine change. If the only prompt for the change is military discipline
scenarios, then as soon as they escape and come home many of them will
swiftly revert to the way that they were before.
Take time to assess your options and take advice online from other parents who have been in your situation.
"Boot-camping" your teen is not always the best option…
Friday, October 18, 2013
Anger Management for Teens
If you're parenting an angry teen, do you feel you might as well head up a down escalator for all the progress you're making? How about we let you in on a little-known secret? You're getting the silent treatment from your –hostile, sullen, rude, cranky, stubborn – teenager because of fear.
She is no longer a child; he is not yet an adult. They are trying to find themselves, to establish their identity. Teens must deal with getting good grades, competitive sports and peer pressure to try addictive substances.
The teen brain is in flux. The frontal lobe of the brain, the reasoner, decision maker and impulse controller isn't totally connected yet. Recent studies show neural development isn't finished until the mid 20s.
Perhaps you can better understand your teen's fear now. As a concerned parent, you are coming from a place of love.
Wash Away Anger
Hand washing is our main defense against disease. The Center for Disease Control (CDC) has found we don't wash our hands long enough. They advise singing the Happy Birthday song two times while we wash.
Casually share this with your teen. Remark that every little thing gets on your nerves lately. It would seem impossible to remain annoyed while singing the birthday song. You're going to try it. What does he/she think?
Let the conversation take its course. She may wish to share some of her issues, or not. But, knowing teens, you'll likely hear him humming later.
Pull Rank
When nothing else works, pull rank. Set a date and time for an outing. Accept no excuses.
Find a neutral zone such as, a walk in the forest or sitting by the lake. Hold hands and be silent. Talking topics:
Nurture self esteem: What are five of your positive qualities?
Open communication: Would the thing you're angry about matter in 5 years? Why? If not, does it make sense to waste energy on it?
Color therapy: If you were a color, what would it be? Both close eyes. Breathe in the color and blow it out vigorously .This exercise diminishes the anger reflex and can be done anywhere, anytime.
Waiting it out: Did you know our anger response lasts about two seconds? Talk about ways to wait out the anger. Get a drink of water? Sing the birthday song?
Beat it out: Take a stick or golf club with you. Invite your teen to whack away at a tree. This is a healthy way to let anger out. Discuss how she/he feels afterward
She is no longer a child; he is not yet an adult. They are trying to find themselves, to establish their identity. Teens must deal with getting good grades, competitive sports and peer pressure to try addictive substances.
The teen brain is in flux. The frontal lobe of the brain, the reasoner, decision maker and impulse controller isn't totally connected yet. Recent studies show neural development isn't finished until the mid 20s.
Perhaps you can better understand your teen's fear now. As a concerned parent, you are coming from a place of love.
Wash Away Anger
Hand washing is our main defense against disease. The Center for Disease Control (CDC) has found we don't wash our hands long enough. They advise singing the Happy Birthday song two times while we wash.
Casually share this with your teen. Remark that every little thing gets on your nerves lately. It would seem impossible to remain annoyed while singing the birthday song. You're going to try it. What does he/she think?
Let the conversation take its course. She may wish to share some of her issues, or not. But, knowing teens, you'll likely hear him humming later.
Pull Rank
When nothing else works, pull rank. Set a date and time for an outing. Accept no excuses.
Find a neutral zone such as, a walk in the forest or sitting by the lake. Hold hands and be silent. Talking topics:
Nurture self esteem: What are five of your positive qualities?
Open communication: Would the thing you're angry about matter in 5 years? Why? If not, does it make sense to waste energy on it?
Color therapy: If you were a color, what would it be? Both close eyes. Breathe in the color and blow it out vigorously .This exercise diminishes the anger reflex and can be done anywhere, anytime.
Waiting it out: Did you know our anger response lasts about two seconds? Talk about ways to wait out the anger. Get a drink of water? Sing the birthday song?
Beat it out: Take a stick or golf club with you. Invite your teen to whack away at a tree. This is a healthy way to let anger out. Discuss how she/he feels afterward
Wednesday, July 17, 2013
The Pinnacle Schools-What Do They Offer?
The Pinnacle Schools, developed by a parent who found her own teen struggling toward adulthood, strive to offer the best possible program of care to both teens and their families. Knowing that there is more than one aspect of every child’s life, the Pinnacle schools strive to address every aspect of their lives to resolve the issues facing them. Pinnacle Schools provide effective treatment plans which are a co-mingling of parental involvement, scholastic achievement, peer interaction, and special challenges that may help the child to develop a higher level of self-esteem.
The Pinnacle School provide for a wide range of different behavioral issues, addressing one or more than one in a child. Offering more than one program for children, the Pinnacle Schools provide counseling and care to the troubled teen as well as help for the parents. Their aspiration is to meet the needs of every child and to work with the parents in order to give the child the kind of treatment they deserve.
The Pinnacle Schools have met or exceeded very stringent guidelines set forth by the Alabama Department of Youth Services. Four times per year they are visited on campus by state auditors who stand as surety for the effectiveness of the program and the compliance of the school with the state standards. Both announced and unannounced visits take place to ensure that the school is operating at peak efficiency and compliance at all times.
The Pinnacle School provide for a wide range of different behavioral issues, addressing one or more than one in a child. Offering more than one program for children, the Pinnacle Schools provide counseling and care to the troubled teen as well as help for the parents. Their aspiration is to meet the needs of every child and to work with the parents in order to give the child the kind of treatment they deserve.
The Pinnacle Schools have met or exceeded very stringent guidelines set forth by the Alabama Department of Youth Services. Four times per year they are visited on campus by state auditors who stand as surety for the effectiveness of the program and the compliance of the school with the state standards. Both announced and unannounced visits take place to ensure that the school is operating at peak efficiency and compliance at all times.
Friday, May 17, 2013
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